• Grief,  Moms,  Mothers,  Uncategorized

    O Jerusalem, Jerusalem!

    On this day, May 21, 2005, I buried my mother. I was in Israel when she passed away in the hospital following developing a poorly treated bed sore that got infected; the poisons overtaking my mother’s already weak body. It took me three days our time (12 hours ahead) before I could get back to South Carolina. No matter how many years pass, my heart still aches, not just that she died, but also how she died; and maybe even when; the when she died. I still struggle with all of that. It interferes with my ability to move past that part of my grief. I know I’m not alone.…

  • Family,  Grief,  Moms,  Mothers

    Israel — The Holy Land

    I made the decision to leave my cell phone at home. It was just that a “phone,” and I didn’t want to pay the extra money required during those days, to have my service switch for international. It’s so much easier and cheaper no. During my recent trip to China, I didn’t have to pay anything for texting services, and very little to make a call. But those days, May 2005, the costs was higher, and the introduction of the smart phone was still over two years away. And I knew if there was an emergency, there would be others on the trip with their phones. So when we landed…

  • Grief,  Moms,  Mother's Day,  Mothers

    My Last Mother’s Day

    The official Mother’s Day holiday, as is celebrated in the United States, originally came through the efforts of a woman name Anna Jarvis. She conceived of the holiday following her mother’s death in 1905, as a way of honoring the sacrifices mothers made for their children. In 1908 she organized a huge Mother’s Day celebration at her church, and four years later, established the Mother’s Day International Association, designed to help promote her efforts to make Mother’s Day a national observance. It wasn’t until 1914 that President Woodrow Wilson signed a measure officially establishing the second Sunday in May as Mother’s Day. Anna Jarvis’ mother, Ann Reeves Jarvis, died on…

  • Friends,  Friendship,  Grief

    Birthdays and Memories. Life Moves Too Fast

    After looking at the clock twice, and wondering where the time had gone this morning, I decided I had just enough time to squeeze in an email I’d been meaning to send all weekend regarding a project I’m about to start working on. It wasn’t going to be a short one, so I grabbed my laptop instead of using my phone, and stared at the screen for a moment, trying to pull my thoughts together. Within seconds of sitting, any thoughts towards completing the email were gone. Instead, my mind was taken away by the iCal prompt that popped on my screen. As I stared at the two day advance…

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  • Fathers,  Grief,  Parents

    When You’re Shocked By Your Sadness

    Weeks before the end of school, and a student gets a phone call. His father has passed away. He wasn’t close to his father. He didn’t grow up with him around, and had only recently reconnected with him as an adult. “So why have I been crying so much?” he asked, as he sat in my office. “It’s not like we were close. I just didn’t expect to feel this way.” I listened as he talked. His countenance had completely changed since I last saw him in class three weeks earlier. It was obvious he wasn’t just hurting; he was lost. He even admitted he didn’t know whether he was…

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  • Grief,  Moms

    Another Sunday Morning It Was Not

    It was another hectic Sunday morning! My life had been on hectic overdrive for the last two years, and getting ready for church this Sunday morning was no different. I’d just sold my house earlier that month and moved back to the side of town that took me more miles away from church, but put me at least at the halfway point to being closer to my work. I’d not yet adjusted my “gotta get out of the house earlier” timing down; having gone from being less than five miles from church, to now being over 15 miles away. I was also still dragging; a little on edge; physically exhausted…